The Power of the Present Moment: Unsubscribed Episode 10
Listen to the Full Podcast here: https://www.barbarasiemen.com/podcast
For women in 2023, there are never-ending distractions, someone or something that always needs your attention, and being present in the moment is a priority that can be quickly forgotten.
Despite the noise that can crowd the hearts and minds of women, mothers, and wives today, living in the present moment is possible. Being conscious in the moment and always working on your and improving spirituality is attainable with the right practices and principles.
By practicing radical acceptance, embracing the power of doubt, and understanding neuroplasticity, you can make the present moment yours whenever you need to.
Radical Acceptance
Years ago, I was depressed and dealing with negative thoughts all the time. I would have thoughts like, “Your family would be better off without you,” and I would accept what my brain was telling me without question. With the help of a therapist, I learned the concept of radical acceptance; I had to start accepting the things happening in my life without judging them as good or bad — they were simply happening.
In the case of my negative mindset, I stopped taking them as truth. Instead, I had to radically accept them as just thoughts. They were thoughts and nothing more, and that meant that they weren’t necessarily true, which helped me take back the power of my mindset.
So your child is sick — rather than following the negative line of thought that says your child is sick so your day is completely ruined and you’re a terrible mother, stop and practice radical acceptance. Your child is sick, and that is out of your control. You can’t change that fact, you can only control what you do with your situation and the information you have. By practicing radical acceptance, we help ourselves stay out of the what ifs, would haves, and should haves, and bring ourselves back to the present moment that we have control over.
The Power of Doubt
Doubt may seem like a negative concept, but the word can have a lot of positive power when used in the right way. As children, we hear, “Oh, I doubt that,” from a parent or an adult in our lives, and when someone who you view as an authority doubts you, you have no choice but to doubt yourself, too.
Storytelling, also known as gossip, is a big issue for adults and it gets passed down to children who observe their parents. We’ve all done it and it can be extremely damaging to families and communities, especially when every story is taken at face value. That’s where the power of doubt comes in and can change a moment completely.
Imagine you’re at lunch with friends and a friend begins telling a story. “I heard a local store owner is overcharging customers,” she says. Your other friends nod and mention that they could see that happening and that they’ll need to avoid that store from now on. But when you stop and say, “I doubt that” the moment is stopped in its tracks.
Rather than living in a story and allowing your mind to get carried away down a path that exaggerates and paints that store owner in a negative light, you are forcing yourself and your friends to remain in the present moment. The story is just a story, and you and your friends are all working with very limited information. You have the power to choose to believe the worst or believe the best, and by expressing your doubt aloud, you’re giving your friends a reminder that they have that power as well.
As an adult, we have to remind our inner child that she doesn’t have to believe everything she hears, even when information comes from a source we trust. By using the power of doubt, we free ourselves from restrictive thinking and we reclaim our mindsets and remain in the moment.
Neuroplasticity
Neuroplasticity is the brain's capacity to continue growing and evolving in response to our life's experiences. As things happen to us, our brains create new pathways of neurons. Our thoughts tend to follow the pathways that we have created in our minds, and these can often be negative pathways.
By practicing radical acceptance and using the power of doubt, we can stop our thoughts on these preexisting pathways and reroute them. As we start to have negative thoughts and spiral, radical acceptance and doubt allow us to slow down and think about where we want that neural pathway to go.
Rather than falling into negative mindsets out of habit, we can create new pathways that, over time, will become the default as we continue to be mindful and keep ourselves in the present moment.
While trying to stay in the moment and being present in our lives can feel overwhelming and frustrating at times, it’s completely possible. As women, mothers, and wives, we don’t always have control over what is going on around us or in the lives of our families and friends, but there are some things we can always keep hold of.
Your mindset is always in your control, and by using these practices, we can improve our neuroplasticity and fall into better, more positive habits in our spirituality and mentality.
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